Last week’s preview was a winner. We nailed four of six questions and also got insanely lucky by guessing Danielle L. as the winner of the most awkward dance I’ve ever seen since Carlton Banks graced our airwaves. This week has added two more questions to the mix which just means two more opportunities to mess up! Let’s get to it.

Question 1

The bachelorettes get to travel this week! Where does Nick whisk them off to?

• Malibu
• Madrid
• Miami
• Milwaukee

Analysis

Malibu is nearish the mansion. The middle options are reasonably sexy locales to hit up with a gaggle of attractive women, so naturally I’m picking…Milwaukee. Look, Nick if from Milwaukee, and he sucks. This doesn’t mean Milwaukee sucks. I was there briefly and it was awesome. But Nick does suck, and he has no imagination, so yeah he’s definitely taking the women to his home town (despite that being a big thing later in the show) in the middle of the fall.

Question 2

TRUE OR FALSE: A bachelorette will take a dip in a hot tub with Nick during this episode.

Analysis

If the question is hot tubs, the answer is always yes.

Question 3

Which of the following is on one of Nick’s date cards this week?

• You are the mane event
• Say cheese
• Can you take the heat
• Love begins here

Analysis

The other questions give us some context here and let us narrow down our options. “Say cheese” is definitely on the table, given that we think they’re going to Milwaukee. The other option (in this author’s humble opinion), is “You are the mane event.” A subsequent true/false asks whether Nick will take a romantic horseback ride with a bachelorette, giving plausibility to the “mane event” option as an answer. Your call on that one.

Question 4

TRUE OR FALSE: Someone will talk to Corinne about her behavior.

Analysis

We saw at the “coming up” section of last week’s episode that Taylor confronts Corinne, causing Corinne to throw a fit about it. So…yeah. True.

Question 5

What does Nick admit he once did for $12?

• Jumped in a river
• Streaked at a baseball game
• Drank two gallons of milk
• Shaved his head

Analysis

Okay, Nick is way too awkward to streak at a baseball game, so that’s out. Jumped in a river seems like a reasonable option for Nick because it’s a) not that exciting and b) something you could see a kid in Wisconsin being dared to do in the middle of Winter. People vomit drinking even one gallon of (whole) milk, and while Nick is dumb enough to brag about getting $12 to drink two gallons, I just don’t see it. He also, for someone who just had the worst fashion choices prior to Bachelor in Paradise, seems unlikely to be willing to shave his head on a lark.

Question 6

TRUE OR FALSE: Nick will take a bachelorette on a romantic horseback ride.

Analysis

I’m torn here. Right now, I personally have “mane event” and “true” selected for this and the prior question, because it seems like a reasonable option for a date while in Milwaukee. On the other hand, if you opt for “say cheese” and the trip to Milwaukee is just a one-on-one, the “mane event” choice is duplicitous and redundant. If you’re saying “true” here, I think you have to go “mane event” earlier, but if you’re leaning “false” you have more latitude.

Question 7

Nick runs into his ______ while on a date this week.

• Kindergarten
• Ex-Girlfriend
• Best Friend
• Personal trainer

Analysis

Shit, idk. I’m convinced he’s going to Milwaukee, so really any of these seem reasonable, and Nick’s history of awkwardness would absolutely trend toward the Ex-girlfriend. Still, I’m leaning best friend because s/he can function as support for Nick as he inevitably failsons his way into more makeouts.

Question 8

How many one-on-one dates will Nick go on this week?

• 0
• 1
• 2
• 3

Analysis

We’ve got what? 17 women left and so far we’ve had the first night, then two episodes of two group dates and one one-on-one. I think we’re not quite at a critical mass to get to more one-on-one dates than group dates at present. I’m saying “1.”

Question 9

Who receives a rose from Nick on a group date that’s not fit for a princess?

Analysis

So there’s a little hint in that “not fit for a princess” part of this question, but really…who knows. I don’t see it aligning with much else in the previous questions except perhaps “Love begins here” as a date card and that’s really too generic to get much out of. The safe play on group dates are: Rachel, Vanessa, and Corinne as they have been early front-runners, though Danielle M. is a possibility as a previous recipient of a one-on-one. I’m going with a wild card though, and picking Alexis. Left Shark has tended to go with the flow and make the best of any situation which makes me think that she could flourish on a date that’s “not fit for a princess.”