Since I’ve had some time to kill recently and I’m tired of meticulously tracking down Chris Harrison’s “casual” line of plaid button ups so I can re-enact The Bachelor in the privacy of my own home (I’ve really been practicing the “coming up” voiceover), let’s go over what ABC has concocted for Week 3 of The Bachelor.

For those who don’t know, for the first time ABC has created a Bachelor fantasy game wherein they give you multiple choice and/or true/false questions prior to each week’s show, and you guess what will or won’t happen. Points are awarded for correct guesses. Simple.

Question 1

The Backstreet Boys visit the mansion this week! What hint do they give the bachelorettes about an upcoming date?

• Hope you’re not afraid to fly!
• Don’t wear makeup.
• No heels.
• Crying isn’t allowed.

Analysis

This is a bit of a tough one. None of these stand out to me as lyrics for their songs, which is the cheesy stuff that The Bachelor likes to pull with their cards/advice. This might just be legitimate, generic advice though, and for something like that I lean towards “No heels.” If the women are gonna be dancing their asses off, they’re going to want sneakers or something similar to do it in. The only one that is throwing me off is “Crying isn’t allowed.” Last week’s set of questions had a bit of a baseball bent, and while it never bore itself out, there could be a baseball date this week that we don’t know about… and we know that there’s no crying allowed in baseball.

Question 2

Instead of a traditional cocktail party, Nick opts for which of the following?

• Pizza party
• Ugly sweater party
• Masquerade party
• Pool party

Analysis

Pizza party is kind of lame given the backdrop of this whole thing, but Nick is also excessively lame, so it’s an option. I’m tossing “Ugly sweater party” out. It’s LA, they don’t need to wear sweaters. Masquerade is an option and Nick has plenty of reason to want to hide…but… I think Jojo did a pool party instead of a cocktail party during her season and Nick is nothing if not unoriginal. Let’s go with pool party.

Question 3

TRUE OR FALSE: Someone will throw up on a date with Nick.

Analysis

It’s pretty straightforward and while it seems unlikely…so far we’ve seen some heavy drinking. I chose yes, and I’ll tell you I was influenced by one of the options in Question 1 and one in Question 4…

Question 4

One of Nick’s group dates this week involves:

• Swimming with dolphins
• Being an astronaut for a day
• Skydiving in Malibu
• Meeting Olympic Athletes

Analysis

Okay so first of all: rude to count Alexis as a dolphin when she was clearly a shark. Secondly, “Hope you’re not afraid to fly” was one of the potential hints delivered by The Backstreet Boys. This could narrow Question 4 options down to “being an astronaut for a day” and “skydiving in Malibu.” Of those two, I could easily see someone throwing up due to the low-gravity situation when being an astronaut, so that’s what I’m going with. Vomiting out of fear before a skydive is also acceptable.

Question 5

TRUE OR FALSE: A bachelorette will take a dip in a hot tub with Nick during this episode.

Analysis

So, if we stick with the Pool Party option, it seems like a safe bet to tilt this 50/50 towards “True.” I’m doing it.

Question 6

Which of the following is NOT on one of Nick’s date cards this week?

• Sometimes you have to leap…
• I’m done playing the field
• Everybody!
• You make me feel like I’m floating

Analysis

Rude af of the Bachelor to not even give us an option to eliminate by comparing back to Question 1 and 4. Leaping could be skydiving. Playing the field could be baseball/no heels. Everybody makes sense as the BSB date card, and if we’re buying the vomiting/space date theory, floating helps there too! I don’t know. You’re on your own with that one. Floating could also be pool party related, field could be track and field (thus match up with the olympians (???)) as could leaping. Who even knows anymore?

Question 7

One girl will have a fairy tale moment with Nick while being serenaded by the Backstreet Boys. Who will that be?

Analysis

Look, this is a shot in the dark. I picked Danielle L. cause Danielle M. got a one-on-one last week and I think we could be on a run. But honestly, really who knows. Let’s just hope it’s not Corinne.